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Monday, August 25, 2008

Oops! I did it again! Got lost in the game, oh baby, baby....

It was revealed to me yesterday, that Misk reads my blog. I actually did not know this until yesterday afternoon, when out of no where, he asked me why I hadn't mentioned the "hot guy in Super Wal-Mart" incident. He then followed up by asking who #1 on my list of non-famous guys I'd sleep with....

*groan*

It's not that I mind Misk reads. It's probably a good thing. He's never mentioned anything I have ever written on here, so until yesterday, I was blissfully clueless. I know now that he does, and I am feeling incredibly self-conscious and wondering if I will have to edit myself now, to protect his fragile ego. I blogged about the hot guy in Wal-mart because really, I didn't have anyone to share it with. When Misk read it, I got exactly the reaction I knew I would have had I told him about it face to face: Jealousy, teasing, and though I don't think he would say it, hurt, because I thought the guy was hot.

So fucking what? He was hot. I still did nothing. I still went home to my husband of nearly 10 years. *rolls eyes*

So now I have to really decide if I wasnt to write everything that happens to me. All my thoughts, even the ones I wouldn't neccessarily share with him. I don't even want to think about what he has read, and what else I think he doesn't know about what I think, but he actually does. Nothing until now affected him, apparently. But one friggin guy tries to pick me up, and I get hell about it for the rest of the day....ok, not hell, but teasing, and he enjoyed watching me squirm, he even said so.

I kinda feel violated. Like my privacy has been breached. Misk has never really had much of an interest in my life that doesn't involve him, so I thought I had the chance to really express myself, really just get it all out there. If for nothing than self-therapy. Now? I am going to be thinking in the back of my mind with every post- How will Misk react? Will this piss him off? Will he understand my meaning behind what I am saying? *sigh*

I will just have to play it by ear....

On other things in my life, Motley Crue are cheap bastards. Awesome music, great show, loud pyro that nearly made me deaf, but it's the first show I've worked as a stage hand that I didnt get a "crew shirt". I was not the only one who was disappointed, as a few of the workers were Crue fans. But I did get a souvenir! I found one of Nikki Sixx's guitar picks on the ground. I also got a giant goose egg on the back of my head from a truss of lights hitting me as I loaded sound wires. Overall not the best work night I could have had last night. At least I get paid.....and I got to see the band eating at catering as I pushed their sound equipment by to the trucks....Vince Neil looked good. Nikki Sixx and Tommy Lee looked hot, and I tried not to throw myself at them.....and succeeded, amazingly enough!

I'm getting old. 10 years ago, I woulda had Tommy Lee right there on the catering table, or damn well tried my hardest to do so. *sigh*

~Cissa

P.S. 6 days until my birthday. I better get a few birthday wishes for you people! eCards are even better. Need an email addy to send one? heartofire@tvcconnect.net

5 flame(s) added to the fire:

Blondefabulous said...

Hoo boy, I so know what you mean! HHH reads (and occassionally guest blogs for)me, and I definitely watch what I say. I tried to have a private blog once, but since we share a computer, he found it and wanted to know what it was and blah blah blah....... So now I just rage to the cat and dog when I want to get some thing off my chest!

sybil law said...

As far as i know, my husband does not read my blog, and I like it that way!
Not even a tee shirt? That's ridiculous!!!
Happy Birthday week!

Winter said...

Nikki is the only man older than me that I would ever do. I like 'em young. Heh. Rott is 6 years younger than me. And he woulda killed to crew for Crue. He was even stabbed at one of their concerts (before the big time) but was so into them he never realized. LOL

metalmom said...

I'll just sigh and live vicariously through you.

If Hubs found my blog, he'd be pissed. Not that I've shared anything overly personal, but he's of the belief that 'Big Brother is everywhere and we are being spied on through our phones and computers.'

Maybe it's true but I don't want to hear a rant every time I check my email!

Queenie said...

My hub reads mine every day. Hell he reads everyone of the 4 I write in. No surprises because he usually knows what I am thinking before I do anyway. Heh. I don't think you should change your writing. Just think about this: If he kids you about getting hit on as you wrote in that post, then he also must read the post you have written that tell us how great he is, how lucky you are and how much you love him. Right?